Something seems very off.....

I moved to Kansas City this past week. In doing so I left the place I called "home" for the past 3 years and many of the closest friends I've ever had. It's weird because the whole reason for moving was to find a job. You graduate college and then find a job, that's what you do or so I've been told, that's why I was supposed to be in college I guess. But funny enough, all of the good times and learning experiences I had in those 4 years were almost completely separate from my classes and majors. And now I've come to the end of that season and have to adjust to a new environment, almost solely because I'm no longer a student and have to get a "real" job. Frustratingly, I've come up empty in the past month-plus of searching.

My last post was made over two months ago and sadly most of what is in it is still true. It's crazy, over the past few days I've thought about this whole situation of moving and job searching and you know what? It sucks. Searching for a job when you don't know what you're looking for is not a good course of action. Majoring in areas that don't really interest you is a bad idea. Daily I'm faced with the very real possibility that I will have to settle for something I don't enjoy. I know the immediate reaction is to ask where God is in all of this. How has He been guiding me or what has He been revealing to me. I don't have an answer. Something really seems off because after consistent reflection and thought I am still virtually clueless. That shouldn't happen but yet here I am.

Now I'm sitting in a new "home" with no job and very little idea of what I actually want to do, asking myself questions that have plagued my life for over 4 years. However, the difference now is I can't put them off any longer. I used to think I would just work on two broad degrees and experience college and in that process discover opportunities or find out what interests me. Well, that never really happened. And now I can't just store these questions up and hope that some revelation happens. Nope, they have to be faced and at the moment I've got nothing, which is not good when decisions have to be made.